PASTA ALIGNMENT

patch 1.0.1: bart at 1am 🌙🚇(ಥ﹏ಥ)
- reduced italian confidence from “roma eterna” to “where the fuck is downtown” 🤌🗺️(; ̄Д ̄)
- added 47-minute delay for “ghost train undergoing vibes” 👻🚈(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
- npc in warriors jersey now screams “AYYYYY” every 3 seconds 🗣️🔥(☞゚ヮ゚)☞
- fixed ai safety researcher opening laptop near suspicious fluid 💻💦(⊙_⊙;)
- p(doom) recalibrated: 8% → 99% after “last train cancelled” 🚨(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
- introduced emergency romano mode: call mom, say “sto bene,” lie 🇮🇹📞(≧▽≦)ゞ
- known bug: owl on platform keeps asking about your priors 🦉(¬‿¬)